Category Archives: Life

Discover the why

In business and in life, if we can discover the why, we can usually discover the how.

I would venture to say that if the real reason you want to earn money is to spend it on yourself and buy things, you will fall short. I have met a lot of conceited people and self-centered people; while they may rise to the top for a season, you don’t see them there long-term.

Look at the pretty and popular ones from your high school. You know, the sports jock and the head cheerleader. At the time, they looked like their entire lives would be on autopilot. Ha. I recently saw someone like this from high school and God’s honest truth, I did not even recognize the person. They had lost all the high school sizzle and pizzazz. Now, they were just old and ugly. I’ve noticed that the more homely looking ones from high school are the very ones that today look great.

What does this have to do with discovering the why? I don’t know, but I got a chuckle out of it.

So, let’s say the reason you work hard is so your children will have a great example. The reason you volunteer at church is because you want to help others. The reason you give regularly to the children’s home is because you want to help. These are the kind of reasons that help drive you. While there are many people that say money is bad, I don’t know of a single children’s wing of a hospital or a child that is touched and helped through college without the use of money. I believe money is a gift from God, so long as it is used in its proper place and some good comes to others through it.

If there is a special need you want to give to, I find it is amazing how much more enjoyable your work becomes. It is because there is a reason that goes beyond just you. It will give you the purest joy.

Find something that you are passionate about and begin to give to it. Then, you will start to see your job or your business as the means to continue giving to it. It will make a difference in how you view your work and what you do. KT

Imagine yourself in 10 years

If you really want to do something great for yourself and your family, get to a quiet place and imagine yourself in 10 years.

Be honest with yourself about money, health, marriage, children, jobs, friends, peace and joy. Often when we imagine ourselves in the future, we see the kind of person we want to be, but people very seldom have a plan to get there. If we are truthful with ourselves, we should ask ourselves if I keep doing what I am doing, thinking like I am thinking and living like I am living, what can I really expect to be different about my life in 10 years?

I suggest (to myself first) that we should all take a serious inventory of our lives and ask ourselves if we stay on this path, will we improve our life? I believe it is a great thing when someone can say honestly say, yes, I am living my life in a manner that will put me in 10 years where I think God is leading me.

Everything about goals really involves small changes in small amounts on a daily basis. Take the fact that I need to lose some weight. It’s very true. I have no doubt that if I started eating differently and stopped eating some things, I could improve my health and extend my life. It’s really pretty simple math, but it’s not simple to begin. It never is.

Most people want the entire change to happen in a week, but life doesn’t work that way. So, let’s all see in our mind’s eye the vision (dream) of who we want to become and start the process of putting ourselves in position to realize that dream and be that person. God would tell us that our history, past experiences, and past failures should be just that…History. God is about today and tomorrow and becoming what he wants us to be.

So, I would say to all of us, choose and choose well because our future depends on it. KT

Lean In

The term “Lean In” was the title of a recent book by a very prominent CEO. Everyone was abuzz about this term, and it was used very publicly as though it was a new term.

The term actually was first introduced in Proverbs 3:5 which says, “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding.

Every piece of wisdom that man has ever said was all originally said in the Bible. Ecclesiastes 1:9 &10 says “the thing that has been, it is that which shall be and that which is done is that which shall be done and there is no new thing under the sun. Is there anything whereof it may be said, see, this is new? It hath been already of old time which was before us.”

This passage means that there is nothing you will go through in your life that God doesn’t have the answer for, and there is not one piece of new wisdom that is not already spoken of in the scriptures. I find that reading the Bible is like opening your front door and saying to God, come on in and show me what I ought to do.

You will never surprise God by telling him what you did because he already knows it all, and he knows every aspect of your life down to the number of hairs on your head.

Don’t leave him out of your decisions because he is the best counselor, financier, lawyer, advocate, father and the very dearest friend you could ever have. He knows everything about you, and he still loves everything about you. KT

Last time in your bed

In my previous blog, I told you about my stepmom. While this will apply to her situation, it also applies to a much more important situation.

My daughter Leslie and I were talking today about hospice for my stepmom, and she said something that gave me great pause.

She said, “no one ever expects that when they get up, it will be the last time sleeping in their own bed”

This applies to my stepmom, but it also applies to each of us. There are car accidents, heart attacks, plane crashes, and sometimes when the body just gives out. This is what I want to talk about.

If you knew tomorrow morning that when you got up it would be the last time you would ever sleep in your own bed, would you do something different today with your life? Tomorrow morning could be the last day for any of us, yet many are not prepared.

While you still can, tell the ones most important to you how much you love them, hug your babies even if they are grown adults, and use today to show love and compassion and kindness in everything you do. I believe one of the worst feelings has to be when you are on the one yard line of life and you know there are unresolved issues within your family.

Choose today and choose now because tomorrow will come and you may not be able to finish what you should. So do it today. KT

When you are told you can’t go home again

I am dealing with one of the most gut-wrenching things I have ever had to do. My stepmom is dying of cancer, and we will be placing her in hospice tomorrow.

As you grow older, you know at some point you will deal with your parent’s aging and health issues, but I don’t believe you ever fully expect when tomorrow becomes today.

I believe deeply that how you respond in these times has a spiritual effect on the balance of your own life. So, when you are faced with these decisions, choose well and choose with compassion and choose with love, whether it is returned or not.

As I went to the hospice today to interview the staff and meet the folks that will be responsible for her care, I thought about the part when you tell your parent they cannot go home again. That thought stopped me and watered my eyes. To be told by a child that you can’t go home again has to be one of the most difficult things to happen in the aging process. Then, to look at her room and know that when she sees the room for the first time, she will see what I see and will know that she most likely will pass away right there in that room.

I am telling you, prepare yourself for that period in your parent’s life, but also for that period in your own life when it is you who decides what to do.

I have gotten a crash course this week on the gap in our medical system that is between the hospital and the end. This period is not covered under medical insurance. The insurance folks will tell you that if you own a home and have any money in the bank, this period is all self-paid, whether it is a nursing home care or 24-hour home care. It is all terribly expensive. My wife and I have a long-term care insurance policy that will keep my children from dealing with this gap in our system. If you don’t have one, you should call your insurance agent today.

There are things in life that you are never prepared for, and this one is a smack daddy. It doesn’t matter if your parents were good parents or bad parents or if you have a relationship or not, this will fall on you at some point.

Aside from all the plans and the expense, the real issue is much, much more personal. It is when your parent wants to go home back to their life, but they can’t take care of themselves. It is the emotional process of looking in their eyes and telling them what you think is best.

In the case of my stepmother, it is about having the remaining months of her life be as easy for her as possible. It is about giving my dad and her the gift of these last few months to spend together in a care situation that is taking care of her and allowing them this period to properly say goodbye. KT