I recently forgave someone for events that happened a long time ago. I really didn’t even know I was still holding on to it until I met with that person. All the memories came like a flood taking me back to a very difficult time in my life. I had to wrestle it down in my spirit and say “no, I will not allow it any longer.”

Forgiveness is one of the most powerful and liberating actions you will ever take. See, I said the word “action” because forgiveness is a choice of action. The only one that can make the choice is you. These things do not correct themselves, rather they just get harder to move on from and release.

Contrary to popular advice, books and opinions, you do not have to talk to the person to forgive them. You don’t have to tell them the whole story, the whys, the wheres, blah blah blah. Forgiveness is a private thing between you and God and no one else. In fact, talking to the person can many times make it worse than before you opened your mouth. Forgiveness is about you and not about them. Let me say that again, forgiveness is about you and not about them. It robs your peace and joy and those things affect only you.

In my situation, I did not even realize that deep inside I still felt the way I felt. There have been many times in my life when I easily forgave and sometimes when it was a little harder, but I make a habit to forgive quickly and often. This one was a lot deeper because it took place when I was vulnerable, afraid and needed to be loved.

Have you ever had a conversation/argument in your mind with a person? Did you win the argument and always say the most impressive things? It’s funny how when you are talking to yourself, you can always win the arguments and really put that person in their place. Ha. It doesn’t work that way in real life.

If you wake up and have an argument with yourself and another person not present more than several times a week, you might want to think about forgiving that person.

The lesson here is that sometimes you have to guard your heart and be very vigilant to forgive and move on. Move on before it affects your life and your family’s life. KT

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