Category Archives: Life

Speaking over something or someone

Word are more powerful than you can imagine. This blog post is going to be about Jesus so if you don’t want to hear about it, then you might want to stop reading.

Words come from your heart and the bible says that whatever is in your heart in abundance will come out of your mouth. Putting all religion aside, everyone, and I mean everyone knows this is true. Words can build up or tear down anyone. Voicing a bad mind set in the morning can have a negative effect on the rest of your day. When you say “I will never be good enough,” “I always fail,” ”I won’t get that job or make that sale,” “I going to die young,” “I will never make it,” you set in motion something you don’t want. If these words come out of your mouth you need this blog post today.

There are feelings and then there is what you believe. Don’t trust your feelings. Trust what you believe. Everyone knows this to be true because your feelings will mislead and misguide you. The bible says to call those things that be not as though they were. The word “call” means to use your voice. Literally speak the words out of your mouth. The words “those things that be not” means to speak those things you want to see happen but have not happened yet in the natural. Again do not follow your feelings and in fact when you feel at your lowest is when you really need to speak some uplifting words to your spirit. Things like “ I will make it,” “I am loved and respected,” I am very good at my job,” “I have many friends,“ “I am in good health,” “I will lose that weight,” “people confide in me because they respect my opinion,” “I am a great mother,” “I am a great dad.” You may not “feel” these things but speaking these words out of your mouth and over your life will have an impact on how you feel.

If you wake up in the morning and say “Lord it is going to be a bad day,” you have just set the course for that day as compared to saying “Lord thank you for this day and it is going to be a tremendous day.” Guard you heart like nothing you have ever guarded because when how you feel becomes how you believe, those words of affirmation or of failure will began to slowly come out of your mouth and those words will change the course of your life.

This not some abra cadabra, wave a magic wand thing. This is base line gospel dealing with life and it is as real as the breath in your lungs. Take a week and force yourself when no one is listening or watching to speak uplifting words to your spirit and take a heart inventory at the end of the week and I believe you will have a new revelation about what I am talking about. KT

What’s important?

In our lives, knowing what is important and what is not should be of real focus to all of us.

I have a friend of mine that refers to this as choosing to win the battle or win the war. The battles are the little things and the war is the important things.

I know a person that said no her children on everything and fussed, nagged and stayed on the children about even the smallest things for years. The children grew up and got to the point of not listening to her at all. She may have won the battles but she lost the war over her children. I have two older daughters and I would like to believe (they may not agree, ha) that we fought to win the wars and choose not to fight every battle. The battles are the picking up the clothes, not washing the dishes, having a party at the house, staying up late, talking to knot headed boys at 1am, returning later than expected from a date and etc. etc. The wars are the important things like their safety, their health, education, sex, drugs, alcohol and the things that could have harmed their lives.

While parenting there are some things you just have to let slide if you want them to listen to you when the important things happen. In business like life, there are some small things you just have to get over because they won’t alter your future like the important things.

It is like the story of the boy who thought it would be funny to cry wolf so all the town would wake up needlessly. He thought it was so funny, he cried wolf several times just for the fun of it. The problem happened when there really was a wolf and when he cried wolf, no one listened to him.

The simple children’s story about the wolf really captures the total essence of this subject. Don’t fight every battle to the death of a relationship because you will not be respected and listened to when the war comes along.

So in your business and family relationships I believe it is important to decide ahead of time which are the battles and which are the wars. Save your influence, energy and strength for the important wars and not every little battle. KT

Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened

There is an elementary school where we live that is closing its doors after some 65 years. They were having a presentation of the school’s achievements to many that taught there and attended there. The school superintendent got up and told the people attending, don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.

I thought that was a pretty profound statement that can apply to much of our lives. Obviously this would not apply for the loss of a family member or other personal situations but for a lot of areas in our lives, it is pretty good advice.

I remember when I resigned some years ago from the publicly traded company I was working for. It was a tough decision and an even more difficult period in my life where this advice would apply to that scenario. My time with that company happened and I learned a lot about business when I was there. I also remember the day I took both of my daughters to college. Those two days were among the most emotional days of my life. I realized they were not just going to college, rather they were leaving home. Anyone who has experienced this life change knows what I am talking about. You know in your heart that that your children going to college is the next step in life and the best next step they could make but it was still very difficult.

There was another time in my life back in 1987 when I was running some restaurants for a company and one of their owners had a Mac computer with a 9 inch black and white screen. He had just learned how to work excel. Well, he thought I should also learn excel and he made me stand behind him and learn the program. I wanted to pick that little computer up and hit him with it because it was during hours upon hours he made me learn it.

The funny thing is that today, excel is the main financial program all businesses function off of and had I not learned it in 1987 I would not be able to do what I do for a living. God can see 20 years ahead in our life when we can only see this afternoon

Think of the homes you have sold and moved from, the jobs you have changed, churches you have attended, the changes in your set of friends, the personal changes in your life and professional changes in your life. This statement by this school superintendent rings true in many situations. Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened. KT

Pushing and shoving

We just got back from an Alaskan cruise and the sights and scenery were literally unlike anything I have ever seen. It was simply breath taking to see Alaska. We went on a four day land excursion before we got on the cruise ship and the places and sights we saw will be the stories of a lifetime.

When we got on the cruise ship there was one aspect that I got to laughing about that I want to share with you. My dad once told me something that is true about cruises. He said that if you time it just right, you can eat 14 times a day. Ha. He was so correct.

Well the buffet line was a source of much amusement for me. You have never seem so much pushing and shoving to get to the food in all of your life. You would think that these people hadn’t eaten for week when in reality they just ate two hours ago. It was particularly funny to watch people from various regions in the US as well as different nationalities. They would break in line, elbow you out of the way and God help them if there was one piece of pizza left. It was one of the funniest things I have ever seen. The people (especially the ladies) over 75 were really the most amusing to watch. You would think that they would be the easiest to get along with and very gentle etc. Not so. They would just come and get in front of you and dare you to say anything. Ha

So there was clearly enough food for everyone to eat 14 times a day without stopping so what made them so aggressive over the food? Well, the fact is that to a certain point we are all that way at times. Have you ever just gotten out of church and get mad when the traffic is slow? Get even madder when the line at the restaurant is long? In life have you ever had thoughts like, I need to get ahead of them, beat them, be more successful than him/her, get there first, do better than that person, etc.? Impatience is within all of us and to some it just gets triggered quicker than others but it is in all of us. Are we always in a hurry?

Slowing down time is hard to do but one of the first steps is to be kind and patient on purpose. It’s a choice. I saw several men on the cruise in wheelchairs and when you see this it stops you in your tracts because you realize how very blessed you are and it keeps you from being in a hurry. The food, the job promotion, the sale or whatever we are in a hurry to get will be much more enjoyable if we don’t run over other people to get it.

I have to hurry up and finish this blog so I get in the front of the buffet line. Ha. KT

Wilbur and Floyd

Wilbur and Floyd are two men who are great examples of how to age with your integrity in place. Both men are family men with older children and grandchildren who are deeply in love with life and their family. They are respected wherever they go. They are kind, honest, gentle and still have eyes that can look right through you.

I haven’t seen Floyd in probably 20 years and a few months ago we were in Sam’s buying a 10 gallon bucket of pickles (ha) and I see Floyd. I walk up to him and he calls me by name and ask how we are doing. Floyd is probably 82-84 years old and has piercing blue eyes. He looked at me as though I was the only one in the room and focused on our conversation like I was someone important. That my friend, is a gift, an anointing and a privilege to be around someone like that.

Wilbur and I served together as ushers at church and he was always the same gentle soul. When you talk to him there is an inner strength that is ever present and you know he is someone you can trust.

It is always been said that if you really want to know the character of a man, just look at his wife’s face. Is she at peace, happy, safe and fulfilled in life? You can read all this in a moment when you look into her eyes. Both Wilbur’s and Floyd’s wife’s were all of these things.

A person as a great example is not defined by wealth, status or title. Those definitions are usually a very wrong reason to look at someone as being a good example.

The older I get the more I love to see people age well and continue to be the same person. I believe aging well should be a goal for us all and doing so while you remain the same person with the same integrity. I saw this guy at a hotel conference that was easily 70 years old and he had a drink in his hand, jell in his died black hair and had his shirt unbuttoned to try an show off God knows whatever he thought he was showing off. He looked like a bone head and a lying, cheating theft. He thought he was cutting a big wake but he actually looked like someone you could not trust. I suspect if you could have met his wife, you would see a very unhappy and very unfulfilled woman.

Mac Collins was a US Congressman from Georgia and a friend of mine. Mac owned a concrete business where I live. I went up to Washington to see Mac one time at the Congressional building and when I went in, I could tell he was the same person in Washington as he was at his concrete business. People trusted him and he honored their trust. He had a plaque on his desk that read “Be Real.” Mac was real and he did keep it real.

In life I think it is really great to meet people that keep it real and don’t try to be someone they are not. You may be able to fool a lot of people but your family always can see through it. Being real is one of the greatest things you can do for yourself and your family. KT