Getting out in front of your skis

The term getting out in front of your skis, refers to someone trying to do more than they are capable of. Basically, getting ahead of themselves. Another similar term is, letting your mouth write a check your body can’t cash

In the world of social media people can say or boast about anything because they are hiding behind a screen. You let that same person be in the real world and chances are, they would be more careful with their words.

There are 73 bible verses that speak about humility. The point is, it does matter how big and important you think you are; the key is recognizing you are still subject to God. The best I can tell, no matter how big your house is, how successful you are, how much your car cost or how much money you have, when we die, all our graves are the same size.

Life is much better for yourself and those around you if you keep your life in check and don’t get out in front of your skis. KT

Taking the kids to school – Tom Brady

During the Super Bowl last night on February 7th, 2021, Tom Brady took the newbies, rookies, Jr’s, and NFL neophytes to school. He was the show master and believe me, he put on a show. I believe this is correct,,,,, Tom Brady is the 10th oldest player (43 yrs. old) to ever play in the NFL and I believe he plans to keep going.

It makes me snicker when you see (and hear) these younger players saying things about him being an old man and they are going to show him what real football is like, yada, yada, yada. Brady just takes it in stride and says “ok, we’ll see” and then goes out there and just blisters the other team.

He has played in 11 Super Bowls and (wait for it,,,) won 7 of them! The greatest quarterbacks in the history of the game (Montana, Young, Bradshaw, Aikman etc) were all probably sitting on their couch last night watching Brady at 43 years old win his 7th Super Bowl ring. He has not only won more Super Bowls than any other player, but also any other team.

Brady was drafted the 199th overall pick in the 2000 draft. The coaches and smart people in the room said he was too slow, too weak, couldn’t run fast and couldn’t throw a tight spiral. Well, 20 years after that draft, Tom Brady took them all to school yesterday and it was  sight to to behold. This should tell everyone reading this blog, not to always listen to what other people say about you. KT

Difference between being respectful and afraid

Have you ever seen a child that is afraid of their parent (s?) They cower down in fear. There is an enormous difference between a child being respectful and minding their mom or dad and the child that minds out of fear.

This mainly happens when the parent is not consistent in their mood and often gets angry very quickly. Children (thank goodness) have a built-in coping ability that adults don’t have. The greatest gift a parent can ever give a child is the knowing that they are safe and loved unconditionally. Read that last sentence again please.

When I was moved to Georgia to live with my father and stepmother, I was 15 years old. Try as hard as I might, I could never please my stepmother. She would send me to do a job like sweeping the driveway and it didn’t matter how long I worked at, she never one time told me I did a good job or thank you. She always pointed out some area I missed.

The problem with this type of parenting is it stays with the child for the rest of their life. Perfect example – I am 63 years old and was doing something around the house the other day and when I finished, I had a flash back to my stepmother and what she would say. This is not healthy for a child and many parents have or are currently making these mistakes. A child needs acceptance. That’s right, a child or teenager needs acceptance even though they may act like they don’t care. Deep down inside they really do. Basically never (regardless of what they do) withhold your acceptance and love from them.

Here is another example of the right way. My stepfather always told me he loved me. Like every kid, I did things that got me in trouble. I remember vividly one time I messed up and my stepfather had to whip me. You know what he did right after he whipped me? He took me in his arms and told me he loved me. That type of love is what I am talking here. Children, preteens and teenagers are very vulnerable and need all the love you can give them but most importantly, tell them and ** show them that they are accepted, loved and they are safe.

Those are the greatest gifts you can give your children. If you don’t believe it, just look at your parents and ask yourself, was I really loved, safe and accepted growing up? That’s all the proof you need. KT

Closing the loop

Men are the worst communicators. Can I get a hello?

Men, as we all know are lacking in many areas of social etiquette. We don’t express ourselves as well as we should, we never want to talk about our feelings and we generally try to avoid conflict like the plaque. Social distancing and quarantine are no problem for a man because it is what most men prefer anyway. ha

I have spoken of this subject a few times, but it still makes me snicker. What I am referring to is people who think if they don’t respond back to someone, that same someone will somehow understand the message and read through the tea leaves and will feel good about it. Well, life just doesn’t work that way.

I am not speaking about someone you don’t know. I am talking someone you know well who a business associate or a friend or maybe both.  I have this friend who is probably sets the gold standard for this practice. In fact, when you look up this phenomenon in the dictionary, it has his picture beside it. ha

This is a person I have know for 35 years but you let me reach out to him on a subject he is not interested in, he just will not communicate. After several weeks when you call him out on it, he acts like he didn’t see your email or hear your voice message. If it is a subject he is interested in, he can’t wait until you call him back.

I had a situation recently where I didn’t want to make the call to a person. I almost sent a text or email, but in the end, decided the only way to handle it professionally was to have a voice call. After the call we both felt good about the decision and were still friends. That would have not happened with a text or email or even voice message. It needed direct communication between friends.

So when there is a situation with the potential of conflict, face to face or a person to person call is the only way to settle the situation down and still retain the friendship. KT

What have I done?

When you start something new, more times than not, it is complicated, scary and can look daunting.

I have a vivid memory of one such time in my life 20 years ago of me sitting on our fireplace hearth asking myself, what the hell have I done? Excuse the word but it’s the only way to express the seriousness I felt at that moment.

Me and two other hotel brokers decided to leave the firm we had been working with for years and start our own company. It’s like a lot of things in that it looks and feels simple at first but when you get into it, you realize how complicated it really is. We had been talking about starting our own company for months but when the day came to resign from the firm, it was like, oh my goodness! I left to come home after we resigned and didn’t answer any phone calls because I just needed time to think.

I got home and went over to the fireplace and turned on the gas logs and sat down. I thought, I have just done something I can’t undo and what in the world was I thinking? The next morning the three of us met at a pancake house and we looked like three frogs caught in hailstorm. Ha. Our eyes were big as saucers because we all knew there was no going back and there was only one path forward. Go do what we had planned to do.

The next several days were stressful but once we found some office space, our heart rates began to settle down and once we got the office set up, we when full bore on building a new company. It all worked out but that first couple days and weeks it looked like we had made the worse decision of our business career.

The point is, most everything is more complicated and scarier at first but as you put one foot in front of the other, you will find your footing and your anxiety level will settle down and life will return to something more normal. The key is to have faith in your decision and in your planning and simply go get the dream you had all along in your heart. KT